i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
