Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
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