we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
