words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
