bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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