gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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