Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".

  (917): View more from New York City

  I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag". (917): I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag. http://tfl.nu/7xie
  Replies (57) Good night (1475) Bad night (11548)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (641): I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting. http://tfl.nu/pz3u
  Replies (27) Good night (9174) Bad night (1004)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?" (763): Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka. http://tfl.nu/xe07
  Replies (10) Good night (3591) Bad night (847)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :) http://tfl.nu/2ogg
  Replies (38) Good night (2046) Bad night (7103)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work http://tfl.nu/9l6e
  Replies (20) Good night (7431) Bad night (1692)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it. http://tfl.nu/rf1i
  Replies (4) Good night (2938) Bad night (1666)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator? http://tfl.nu/y95u
  Replies (36) Good night (6805) Bad night (966)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight.... http://tfl.nu/1kod
  Replies (9) Good night (1045) Bad night (1545)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel http://tfl.nu/a8sv
  Replies (7) Good night (1834) Bad night (975)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me. http://tfl.nu/f868
  Replies (5) Good night (1225) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers. http://tfl.nu/2uqi
  Replies (1) Good night (621) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info. http://tfl.nu/i0nt
  Replies (0) Good night (383) Bad night (497)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me http://tfl.nu/haec
  Replies (9) Good night (794) Bad night (389)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic http://tfl.nu/6igt
  Replies (2) Good night (338) Bad night (215)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you. http://tfl.nu/kzde
  Replies (1) Good night (484) Bad night (120)

Randomize