Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
