I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
