I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
