Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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