If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
