ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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