last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
