so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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