I think I died a long time ago.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Randomize
