There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
