So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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