Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
