well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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