dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
