she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
