Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
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