he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
