A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
