Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
