I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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