He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
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I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
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I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
You are a genius and a whore.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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