this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize