How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
