Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
false alarm, still single
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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