and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Woke up backwards on a recliner
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
