it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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