I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
