I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
