Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize