Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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