dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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