My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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