We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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