how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize