I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
