She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
He kissed a someone with a penis
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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