The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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