I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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