I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
What drink are we having for lunch?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
