i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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