oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Randomize
