I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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