i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
